Includes tags: Right Speech, False speech, Malicious speech, Harsh speech, Idle chatter, Admonishment/feedback
“A question regarding the 5 precepts. In daily life, I am really good about keeping #1, 2, 3 and 5; but somehow I found that the precept #4 is really hard. I find myself lying everyday such as: ‘Do I look good?’ → Yes, of course. ‘Do you want to eat some more?’ → No, thanks, I’m full (but in fact the food didn’t taste good). Or speaking at a wrong time, speaking too long, too short, too harsh or speaking with a wrong tone of voice. This is the hardest one for me. Kindly advise. Thank you.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Five Precepts] [False speech ] [Right Speech ] // [Monastic life] [Precepts ] [Pāli] [Learning]
Quote: “The function of the precepts in terms of practice is to provide a mirror so we can understand our own intentions and volitions.” [Volition]
2014 Thanksgiving Monastic Retreat, Session 6, Excerpt 1
“During the Christmas holiday, I’m going to be spending some time with relatives who do not share my same political views. In the spirit of wanting to understand their views and wanting to heal the divide that exists in our country, I want to talk about the election with them. How do I have this conversation skillfully?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Family] [Politics and society ] [Right Speech ] // [Judgementalism] [Listening] [Human] [Sense restraint]
Thanksgiving Retreat 2016, Session 2, Excerpt 16
“Does gossip include talking about someone who is not present for entertainment value?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Malicious speech ] [Idle chatter] // [Communal harmony] [Abhayagiri]
“If someone spreads a harmful story about another that is untrue, but has convinced her/himself it is true (including her/his own embellishments), does this break the fourth precept?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Malicious speech] [False speech ] // [Precepts] [Ajahn Chah] [Volition] [Truth] [Nature of mind]
Quote: “The precepts are there for training as opposed to making a legal decision or character judgement.”
Thanksgiving Retreat 2016, Session 4, Excerpt 11
“What is the role of admonishement? How do we admonish skillfully?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Admonishment/feedback ] [Monastic life] [Saṅgha] // [Right Intention] [Goodwill] [Mentoring] [Respect for elders]
Vinaya: Kd 18.11.14, Kd 18.12.8: Mutual admonishment between teacher and student. [Admonishment/feedback ]
Story: Ajahn Amaro waits a year before giving feedback. [Admonishment/feedback ] [Ajahn Amaro] [Patience]
Quote: “Don’t admonish somebody before the meal.” — Ajahn Chah. [Ajahn Chah] [Admonishment/feedback ]
8. Ajahn Chah made me look at myself. Teaching by Ajahn Sumedho. [Teaching Dhamma] [Ajahn Chah] [Ajahn Sumedho ] // [Hearing the true Dhamma] [Posture/Sitting] [Pain] [Aversion] [Admonishment/feedback] [Humor] [Patience] [Goodwill] [Discernment] [Contentment] [Cessation] [Happiness] [Saṅgha] [Views] [Relinquishment]
Quote: “Your practice now is patience.” — Ajahn Chah.
Story: Ajahn Chah chats for hours after Pāṭimokkha. [Idle chatter] [Judgementalism]
4. Story: “Sleep is delicious.” Told by Ajahn Amaro. [Admonishment/feedback] [Goodwill] [Ajahn Chah] // [Ajahn Amaro ] [Joseph Kappel] [Upatakh] [Wat Pah Nanachat] [Robes] [Mentoring] [Faith]
17. Quote: “Look at others 10% of the time and look at yourself 90%; that’s about the right measure.” — Ajahn Chah. Quoted by Jack Kornfield. [Ajahn Chah] [Judgementalism ] [Admonishment/feedback] [Discernment] // [Idealism] [Conventions] [Heart/mind] [Vinaya]
Story: Ajahn Chah’s teacher eats sloppily. [Teachers] [Food] [Suffering]
20. He encouraged people to let go in so many different ways. Recollection by Jack Kornfield. [Relinquishment ] [Teachers] [Views] [Eightfold Path] [Ajahn Chah] // [Idle chatter] [Seclusion] [Aversion] [Ghost] [Fear] [Restlessness and worry] [Sense bases] [Direct experience] [Liberation]
Story: Sit in the middle of your anger. [Jack Kornfield] [Robes] [Lodging]
Story: Walk backwards in the forest in the middle of the night. [Sloth and torpor] [Posture/Walking] [Culture/Natural environment]
5. Story: Ajahn Chah orders Ajahn Sumedho to stay in England for five years. Told by Ajahn Sumedho. [Ajahn Sumedho] [History/Western Buddhist monasticism] [Ajahn Chah] // [Determination]
Story: The Kaṭhina that Ajahn Sumedho didn’t want to attend. [Kaṭhina] [Thai Ajahn Chah monasteries] [Harsh speech]
7. Qualities of Ajahn Chah’s speech. Reflection by Ajahn Sumedho. [Right Speech] [Ajahn Chah] // [Malicious speech] [Thai sects] [Fierce/direct teaching] [Trust] [Humor] [Goodwill] [Present moment awareness]
6. Recollection: The June 2000 Saṅgha Meeting concludes in harmony. Recounted by Ajahn Sumedho. [Wat Pah Pong] [Saṅgha] [Saṅgha decision making] [Communal harmony] [Ajahn Chah] // [Views] [Harsh speech] [Asking forgiveness ceremony] [Three Refuges] [Culture/West]
Quote: “Luang Por Chah wasn’t giving us views and opinions....[He gave] us all a confidence in the unspoken unity of our humanity.” [Faith] [Human]
4. “If my sister has unwholesome friendships, how can I help her redirect these?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Family] [Spiritual friendship] // [Compassion] [Judgementalism] [Right Intention] [Right Speech] [Admonishment/feedback]
Story: An Abhayagiri monk skillfully conveys concerns to his father. [Right Speech] [Admonishment/feedback] [Abhayagiri]
7. “Given the situation in Burma with Buddhist monks fomenting violence against Muslims, how do you determine whether to respond to that vocally or publically?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [History/Other Theravāda traditions] [Conflict] [Politics and society] [Monastic life] [Islam] [Right Speech] [Media] // [Military]
2. “Is it possible for an arahant to have seemingly negative thoughts or speech while free from defilement? In the Udana, Venerable Pilindavaccha gets complained about for calling monks outcastes or lowlings.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Arahant] [Unskillful qualities] [Great disciples] [Harsh speech]
Sutta: Ud 3.6: Pilindavaccha.
Quote: “Purity or impurity—you have to know for yourself.” — Ajahn Chah. [Ajahn Chah]
Vinaya: Kd 18.11.14 and Kd 18.12.8.4: Students and teachers are mutually accountable. [Vinaya] [Mentoring]
8. “Can we talk at breakfast please?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Right Speech] [Meditation retreats]
7. “I have another question about balance. LP Baen encouraged his monks to admonish each other, but Ajahn Chah said to put 90% of your attention on your self and only 10% on other people?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Baen] [Admonishment/feedback] [Ajahn Chah] // [Culture/Thailand] [Culture/West]
Quote: “If someone criticizes you, then you should raise your hands in añjāli and say ‘Sadhu!’ because you don’t have to hire them to do it for you!” — Ajahn Chah. [Admonishment/feedback] [Respect] [Gratitude]
8. “Isn’t there a story about when Ajahn Chah wanted to give feedback to a senior monk and he waited 20 or 30 years?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Chah] [Admonishment/feedback] [Right Speech] // [Ajahn Baen] [Vinaya] [Protocols] [Cleanliness]
4. “Was Ajahn Jun around when you were training?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Jun] [Ajahn Pasanno] // [Ajahn Chah] [Ajahn Liem] [Ajahn Boon Choo]
Story: Ajahn Sumedho gets upset at Ajahn Chah for not admonishing lax monks. [Ajahn Sumedho] [Admonishment/feedback]
12. A retreatant expresses appreciation for Upasika Kee Nanayon’s exhortation to be honest with ourselves. [Unwholesome Roots] [Upasikā Kee Nanayon] [Truth] [Gratitude]
“You can lie to the entire world if you like, but you must never lie to yourself.” – Mae Chee Kaew: Her Journey to Spiritual Awakening and Enlightenment by Ajahn Dick Sīlaratano, p. 235. [Mae Chee Kaew] [False speech]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Self-identity view] [Culture/West]
4. Comment: The story you told where a monk was punched, I really didn’t see the point of that. [Ajahn Jia] [Admonishment/feedback] [Fierce/direct teaching]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Cunda: Enlightened people still have personalities. [Cleanliness] [Liberation] [Personality] [Ajahn Tate] [Spiritual friendship] [Vinaya]
Quote: “Gold wrapped in a dirty rag.” — Ajahn Mahā Boowa describing Ajahn Jia.. [Ajahn Mahā Boowa] [Similes]
Recollection: Ajahn Chah was always the center of attention. [Ajahn Chah] [Personal presence]
Story: Some monks go to spend Vassa with Ajahn Jia, but he leaves to take care of his teacher. Told by Ajahn Cunda. [Rains retreat] [Ajahn Khao]
2. “There were a number of different alms routes out of Wat Pah Pong. How was it decided who went on each one and how was the food distributed for the meal?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Wat Pah Pong] [Almsround] [Almsfood] [Saṅgha decision making] // [Wat Pah Nanachat] [Ajahn Liem]
Discussion of almsfood distribution at different monasteries. Led by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Pesalo. [Ajahn Tongrat] [Wat Pah Ban Tat]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno helped pass out food at Wat Pah Pong. [Ajahn Pasanno]
Story: Ajahn Tongrat exposes a monk concealing fish in his ball of sticky rice. [Food] [Admonishment/feedback]
Comments by Ajahn Pesalo and Ajahn Pasanno about food distribution at Wat Baan Tat. [Mutual lay/Saṅgha support]
Quote: “It’s incredibly tiresome how organized we [Westerners] have to be....Organic spontaneity–that’s how things work in Thailand.” [Culture/West] [Culture/Thailand]
3. “Would Luang Por Chah teach or test monks and students in different ways?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Chah] [Mentoring] [Fierce/direct teaching]
Recollection: Joseph Kappel shakes with fear when on the receiving end of Ajahn Chah’s admonishments. [Joseph Kappel] [Admonishment/feedback] [Fear]
1. “A question regarding the 5 precepts. In daily life, I am really good about keeping #1, 2, 3 and 5; but somehow I found that the precept #4 is really hard. I find myself lying everyday such as: ‘Do I look good?’ → Yes, of course. ‘Do you want to eat some more?’ → No, thanks, I’m full (but in fact the food didn’t taste good). Or speaking at a wrong time, speaking too long, too short, too harsh or speaking with a wrong tone of voice. This is the hardest one for me. Kindly advise. Thank you.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Five Precepts] [False speech ] [Right Speech ] // [Monastic life] [Precepts ] [Pāli] [Learning]
Quote: “The function of the precepts in terms of practice is to provide a mirror so we can understand our own intentions and volitions.” [Volition]
1. “What are the rewards for the skillful monk?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Monastic life] [Skillful qualities] [Right Mindfulness] // [Happiness] [Mindfulness] [Clear comprehension] [Concentration]
Sutta: SN 47.8: Simile of the skillful cook. [Similes] [Similes]
Story: Ajahn Mun criticizes Ajahn Mahā Boowa for developing meditation like a tree stump. [Ajahn Mun] [Ajahn Mahā Boowa] [Admonishment/feedback]
14. Comment: This speaks to a Boddhisattva/Zen approach to karma. It’s more your attitude towards your karma. [Bodhisattva] [Zen] [Kamma] [Merit] [Tudong] [Harsh speech]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Impermanence]
15. “There is a mean streak in my family, a tendency to be dishonest and manipulative. I can see how it has been passed down over generations. I have worked hard to overcome these habits in myself. At this stage of life my familiar relationships are mostly positive and harmonious, but I still sometimes run across their manipulation or dishonesty. I would like to discuss or address it within my family, but there is no apperent recouse or means of addressing the situation. Any suggestions?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Family] [False speech] [Habits]
Quote: “I don’t teach my family anything.” [Ajahn Pasanno] [Teaching Dhamma]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno’s mother visits Abhayagiri. [Parents] [Kaṭhina]
11. “Do you have any tips for embodying the Dhamma in business situations when negotiating with aggressive individuals? I tend to walk away at a certain point, but am wondering if there’s another way to turn it around, make it better for everyone?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Dhamma] [Work] [Right Speech] // [Goodwill] [Trust] [Clear comprehension] [Truth]
13. “When you’re living on the precepts, how do I relate to (for example) a friend who tells me about an affair they are having?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Jotipālo. [Precepts] [Spiritual friendship] [Sexual misconduct] // [Skillful qualities] [Admonishment/feedback] [Discernment] [Right Speech] [Vinaya] [Abhayagiri]
Quote: “Don’t admonish your fellow monks before the meal.” — Ajahn Chah. Quoted by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Chah] [Admonishment/feedback] [Monastic life] [Food] [Eating after noon]
9. “Can Ajahn Pasanno teach us how Ajahn Chah teaches or gives techniques on physical states and mental states? Can you tell us more about Ajahn Chah’s biography, for example, when and how Ajahn Chah wanted to become a monk?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Chah] [Form] [Heart/mind] // [Christianity] [Conditionality]
Recollection: Ajahn Chah engaged in conversation with the villagers before the meal to reveal the junior monks’ desires around food. [Idle chatter] [Food] [Sensual desire]
Advice from Ajahn Chah: “Don’t admonish anybody before the meal.” [Admonishment/feedback]
Update about the progress on the new Ajahn Chah biography. [Dhamma books] [Ajahn Jayasaro]
Reference: Stilness Flowing
Story: Nine year old Ajahn Chah goes to the monastery after getting fed up with household chores. [Culture/Thailand] [Geography/Thailand] [Faith] [Monasteries] [Family] [Work]
14. “When talking with friends, sometimes the topic of faith and religion comes up. Normally, I find this topic pleasant and enjoyable, but on occasion, I find myself in conversation with somebody who believes (often quite insistently) that their faith is “the only way”. Do you have an advice on how I might skillfully navigate these situations?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Faith] [Right Speech] [Spiritual traditions]
16. “During the Christmas holiday, I’m going to be spending some time with relatives who do not share my same political views. In the spirit of wanting to understand their views and wanting to heal the divide that exists in our country, I want to talk about the election with them. How do I have this conversation skillfully?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Family] [Politics and society ] [Right Speech ] // [Judgementalism] [Listening] [Human] [Sense restraint]
11. “If someone spreads a harmful story about another that is untrue, but has convinced her/himself it is true (including her/his own embellishments), does this break the fourth precept?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Malicious speech] [False speech ] // [Precepts] [Ajahn Chah] [Volition] [Truth] [Nature of mind]
Quote: “The precepts are there for training as opposed to making a legal decision or character judgement.”
2. Comment: Ajahn Amaro talked about a teacher who was an ex-boxer with rough manners. [Personality] [Fierce/direct teaching]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Unwholesome Roots]
Story: Ajahn Mun admonishes Ajahn Mahā Boowa: “You need to develop some subtlety!” [Ajahn Mun] [Ajahn Mahā Boowa] [Admonishment/feedback]
1. Quote: “That person is making me suffer....If they would just smarten up and do what I like, then I would be happy. My life would be smooth and peaceful again, just like it always was before.” — Ajahn Pasanno. [Cause of Suffering] [Humor] [Politics and society]
Quote: “Don’t believe your mind. It’s a liar and a cheat.” — Ajahn Chah. [Ajahn Chah] [Heart/mind] [False speech] [Delusion]
18. “For the sake of the precepts, what’s the definition of gossip?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Precepts] [Malicious speech] [Idle chatter]
19. “Does gossip include talking about someone who is not present for entertainment value?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Malicious speech ] [Idle chatter] // [Communal harmony] [Abhayagiri]
6. “Is there a place to point out others’ difficulties [in the practice]?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Admonishment/feedback] [Right Speech] [Community] [Monastic life] [Saṅgha] // [Ajahn Chah] [Teaching Dhamma]
7. “What is the role of admonishement? How do we admonish skillfully?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Admonishment/feedback ] [Monastic life] [Saṅgha] // [Right Intention] [Goodwill] [Mentoring] [Respect for elders]
Vinaya: Kd 18.11.14, Kd 18.12.8: Mutual admonishment between teacher and student. [Admonishment/feedback ]
Story: Ajahn Amaro waits a year before giving feedback. [Admonishment/feedback ] [Ajahn Amaro] [Patience]
Quote: “Don’t admonish somebody before the meal.” — Ajahn Chah. [Ajahn Chah] [Admonishment/feedback ]
8. “Does the proper timing of admonishment depend on the severity of the offense?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Admonishment/feedback] [Vinaya] [Monastic life] [Saṅgha]
9. “When and how should one respond to offenses of middling severity?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Admonishment/feedback] [Vinaya] [Monastic life] [Saṅgha]
13. “The fourth precept used to be translated as false and harmful speech. In the new chanting book, it’s just lying. Is there a reason for this?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [False speech] [Pāli] [Chanting] // [Right Speech]
Reference: Amaravati Chanting Book, p. 130 [False speech]
Sutta: MN 41: Saleyyaka Sutta
7. “In what way are qualities and effects viral? Are right perception, right speech, right thought, and right action also viral?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Media] [Online community] [Perception] [Right View] [Right Speech] [Right Action] // [Abhayagiri] [History/Western Buddhism] [Mindfulness] [Skillful qualities] [Happiness] [Tranquility] [Trust] [Human]
5. “When someone shows you how to do something correctly but the manner in which they convey the message is rude, what is the most skillful thing you can do to let the person know they were perceived as rude but fully absorb the content of their beneficial message?” Answered by Ajahn Ñāṇiko. [Admonishment/feedback] [Right Speech] // [Cultural context] [Equanimity] [Nonviolent Communication]
6. Reflection by Ajahn Karuṇadhammo: Lovingkindness in speech and the ethic of sharing circles at Abhayagiri. [Goodwill] [Right Speech] [Abhayagiri] [Sharing circles] [Communal harmony] // [Principles of Cordiality] [Ajahn Sudanto] [Listening] [Nonviolent Communication] [Conflict]
Sutta: MN 48: Kosambi Sutta.
5. “How does one practice wise restraint in lay life when one has to deal with family, friends, coworkers, and so on? Especially on the level of speech and emotions that one encounters.” Answered by Ajahn Karuṇadhammo. [Sense restraint] [Lay life] [Right Speech] [Emotion] // [Discernment] [Unwholesome Roots] [Appropriate attention] [Continuity of mindfulness] [Mindfulness of body] [Clear comprehension]
Vinaya: Conditions for skillful admonishment in the Buddhist Monastic Code’s discussion of Bhikkhu Saṇghādisesa 8. [Admonishment/feedback] [Right Speech]
10. Story: Chatting loudly with the windows open. Told by Ajahn Cunda. [Idle chatter] [Abhayagiri] // [Ajahn Pasanno] [Admonishment/feedback]