Openness of the Heart: Equanimity

The teachings around the openness of the heart also include equanimity.

Equanimity is the capacity to be at peace with success and failure, gain and loss, good and bad health, and so on. It’s this steadiness of mind that allows us to remain balanced when confronted with life’s ever-changing circumstances.

However, equanimity without an open heart can easily become cold indifference, repression, or disassociation in the face of whatever may be arising in one’s own experience or in the experiences of others. So the joy, compassion, and well-wishing that naturally flow from an open heart are meant to coexist with this sense of deep peace.

When open-heartedness and equanimity are both present, there’s a profound acceptance of the fact that that which has the nature to arise, has the nature to cease. Events are as they are. According to Theravada Buddhism, it’s this combination of open-heartedness and evenness of mind that gives us a sense of emotional balance.

When we hear about someone sustaining a serious loss, or getting sick or dying, it’s this equanimous mind that enables us to reflect: “Ah, life is this way. Life has loss.” To recognize this fact implies a kind of strength without being dismissive. While you need to have compassion to do the utmost you can to help other beings, you also have to realize that we all have lives that include both gain and loss.

Ajahn Chah and Ajahn Liem are perfect examples of this: both teachers possess tremendous compassion, but they also have a deep, peaceful acceptance of the ways things are, rather than demanding that they be different.

Do look at the difference between sentimentality and the open heart. When you sincerely abide in the open heart, it’s not at all sentimental in the sense of seeing things as sweet and syrupy and then thinking, “Oh, everything is wonderful.” Open-heartedness is a beautiful, direct, and honest connection to life that’s very powerful and visceral.

It’s when you connect with someone who’s happy and you also revel in their happiness. That’s not being sentimental or “gushy.” You’re simply connecting in a kind, heartfelt way to another person.

This reflection by Ajahn Viradhammo is from the book, The Contemplative’s Craft, (pdf) pp. 150-151.